Passages, a Blog
Be it physically scaling mountains, or in your personal life...these paintings are a metaphor for pushing past life’s challenges and in doing so building your strength and rediscovering and appreciating the sweet taste of freedom.
In my recent journey I had a transition out of my caregiver role. My mom passed last November and we moved my dad into a care home in April. Having been their caregiver for the last 6 years, this is a big shift.
I was honoured to be their caregiver and would do it again in a heartbeat but it also took everything out of me. My physical and mental well being was at its lowest ever. I don’t think I really knew the depths of it until the shift occurred. You know how that goes, you can’t feel or see the gradual shifts when you’re in it, not until you’re removed from it. The real signal was when I was cleaning out their estate of 48 years. After 8 weeks I had gone through the important stuff, the personal items, the cherished family photos and lineage records. This was a beautiful experience. Especially pouring over those family photos. All the past memories of all the good times being prioritized into the forefront of my present consciousness. But the last things to do were the hard things. A 1600sq foot crawl space and 3 out buildings, where everything nobody knew what to do with was shoved away. Out of sight out of mind. Except now it was weighing heavily as my sole responsibility. It wasn’t just the monumental physical task of removing and sorting through 48 years of collected items, it was the thought of ending on that note. I have had such a fulfilling relationship with my Mom and Dad in the last few years, I didn’t want to tarnish that with what I knew would be a growing resentment of “why didn’t they deal with this!?” You hear so much fodder from the happiness gurus to design your own happiness (don’t fill your life with things that weigh you down). So I hired out! The minute the Estate Sales Company took the job, a gargantuan weigh came off my heart and soul. I have had such a lightness of being ever since. I know you caregivers out there know what I mean. I feel so free and invigorated. I have had time to start caring for myself again. Exercising, eating well, more painting time and learning new painting techniques!
In this collection of paintings, I learned how to underpaint. for those that don’t know what this is, it is an initial layer of paint applied to a ground, which serves as a base for subsequent layers of paint. Underpaintings are often monochromatic (I have used, pink, rust or yellow in these new paintings) and help to define colour values for later painting. The Coles notes version, you paint it first in one colour only in order to understand your subject before adding multiple colours. It also gives the paint life. It helps the subject become alive and illuminated instead of flat and lifeless. In my painting of Crystal Cove and MacKenzie beach, (both on Long Beach, BC, near Tofino) I left quite a bit of the pink underpainting showing through and you can see it gives the illusion of light and life. In my painting of The Wild Pacific Trail, in Ucluelet, I left a smidge of the rust underpainting in the rocks and on the horizon and it just glows of the canvas. This process was challenging to learn (if you’re over fifty years old I bet you can relate!?) but I really felt my learning curve was sharp.
As it goes, I was hired to do two commissions in the midst of this new body of work. One of Mount Arrowsmith and one of Lake Cowichan. I was gifted the best Art Collectors. They both gave me just a tad of guidance but mostly left the process of picking colour and composition to me. I knew the first client loves pink and purple, so we loaded the mountain ranges, sky and water with tons of those bright tones and shades. But I balanced those bright colours with a dark grounding colour like the super popular Sherwin Williams Cyberspace(I’ve been drooling over my neighbour’s kitchen island paint colour). For the other commissioned painting of the lake, I was lucky enough to visit the clients brand new lake house and consult in person. Her house colours were neutral and a mix of warm and cool, So I incorporated both of those in a range of cool and warm blue palette.my fav go-to mix of burnt umber and pthalo blue that creates this gorgeous warm teal and the classic paynes gray mixed with varying amounts of white. Both of those commissioned paintings will be available as prints soon, so stay tuned for that launch.
Since loosing my Mom and being away from my Dad, people have asked me if I’m ok. Believe me, I cried hard when I lost my Mom and I cried hard when I checked my Dad into his Care-home (in the midst of the Covid era no less, can you say stressful?) but the truth is, when you’re loved ones have Dementia, you experience a slow loss and long goodbye. When it finally comes to an end there is a massive feeling of relief and gratitude. My Mom is no longer suffering and my Dad has transitioned easily and has no more anxiety from trying to figure everything thing out on his own. And he says the food and people are great! He’s such a charmer, they are loving him too. So all in all, I am happy because they are in a better place. Everyone is where they need to be be and I am excited to embark on carving out more time for my creative journey I’ve waited so long to take. Thanks so much for being here on the ride with me. If you’d be so kind, pop back to my Instagram account to share your thoughts with me. Link at the very bottom of this page. xo Ronei